#17: Two Years Ago Today

Two years ago today, I lost a dear childhood friend. A boy who was like a brother to me, who I had known since we were five years old. Because of the actions of one of his drunk friends, he was in a car accident, and suffered unfixable brain damage. The accident was a year and two days ago, it happened on the 15th.

I can't believe how long it's been. I miss him. And it really hurts that we weren't very close in the end, like we used to be. But I'm really glad people took the time to remember him. Two girls from school made 300 green ribbons for people to pin over their hearts today. Gage decided to donate his organs after he died, so the green ribbon has kind of been his symbol to everyone who knew him, and even people who didn't know him, in our town.

For the past two days, I felt as if today was going to be horrible, and that I would end up crying at school or something. But it wasn't bad at all. I actually kind of had fun at school. And I've spent all evening on BlogTV with Vee, and an hour on it with GeorgieBOOM, which made me laugh a lot. 

In a way, I feel really bad for having fun, because his life ended so suddenly, and he should still be here with us. But at the same time, I feel as if I SHOULD be having fun, and enjoying life. If Gage's death has taught me anything, it's that life is short, we never know when our's is going to end, and we should make the best of the time we have. 

This kind of missing and longing really hurts. It kind of just hit me. When I miss my friends, I know I'll see them again. But with Gage, I know that I never can see him again. It hurts. A lot. For the past two years, I've kept his obituary at the bottom of my mirror, because I wanted to be able to remember him every day, but the past little while, it seems like I've overlooked it, and forgot about him. I should remember him every time I get on the bus, and he's not there, or when I talk to my elementary school classmates, because we were all so close (there were eight of us that went to high school from elementary school together). 

I really just wanted to take the time to remember him like this. And I think that his death teaches everyone who knew him a lesson. Don't waste the time you have here. Seize the day, and make the best you can out of your life. Be happy as much as possible, and never take anyone or anything for granted.